Tip #5 - Turn off the TV

So at 10:30pm last night after all the kiddo's are in bed my 3yr old appears in my bedroom.  We visit for a while (no actually I'm on the phone with Darling Husband who is away camping with our oldest and I attempt to ignore the child while talking to his father).  While transporting the child back to his room, "Carry me like a baby", I notice with a pang of DREAD and FEAR that the front door is open.  I stand there stupidly wondering why we don't have a gun and try to listen (over the obnoxious singing of my child) for the obvious intruder.  Little boy says to me, "Charlotte went outside".  Charlotte is 5.  I completely ignore him.  I finally get my wits about me and decided to check on the kids first and then check on the thief who is definitely robbing us blind downstairs.  I went to the boys room - sleeping soundly, not realizing that their mother is sacrificing herself to the wolves.  Baby says again, "Charlotte went outside."  I ask him to be quiet, I don't need the thug to know where I am.  I head toward Charlotte's room that she and the baby share.  He says again, "Charlotte went outside."  I begin to walk faster as I begin to take this sage-like child seriously.  I am again filled with DREAD and FEAR as I open their room and Charlotte is NOT in bed.  I sail down the stairs, intruder be darned, and run out the front down.  I begin yelling for Charlotte knowing full well she will not answer, praying she will make an exception in this case.  No answer.  I am cursing myself for not breaking her of this habit of ignoring me before now.  I fly to the back door, just in case, and fairly scream for her in the back yard.  Predictably no answer.  I eye the phone and wonder if a policeman will have better results.  I decided to try the front again when Charlotte comes in the front door.  She is completely dressed - shoes, jacket and all - something I can't get her to do on the best of days.  Deciding not to go completely ape on her I shakily ask her what the HECK she was doing outside.  "I was sitting in the bush being a ninja."  I stand there overwhelmed by the adrenaline coursing through my veins, shaking uncontrollably, and completely stupefied by her answer.  I chain the front door, put her back in bed and stay awake for the next 3 hours thanking the Lord for her safety and trying to decide where I've gone wrong.